How to learn to enjoy life and overcome depression advice
Posted On 13.03.2021
How to learn to enjoy life advice
Each man sooner or later falls into such a situation when he is overwhelmed by pessimistic feelings, extension, depression, the lack of joy in life and complete apathy for what is happening.
Maintenance advice that will help overcome depression, gain confidence and teach to see the positive parties in all:
Know your desires. It is quite difficult to learn to enjoy life when there are many problems that need to be solved. Often the problem is reflected in the habit of looting on the bad and in the lack of searching for positive sides in problem situations.
Live today. This valuable quality often man leaves in childhood. Thinking about the future we spend a lot of energy, which leads to the inability to rejoice. The future will always be unpredictable for us. Learning to live is really difficult, but really. It is necessary to thank the life every day for what you have.
To be able to give. By configuring your meaning of life to return mode, you can feel the harmony of joy. After all, the return is considered to be some kind of creativity, which manifests itself in the care of loved ones.
How to overcome depression and learn to enjoy life
To overcome depression, find confidence, first of all, a person should be able to rejoice, it is easy to endure the moments of parting, constantly charged with optimism. All this will make any man and a woman happy.
It is necessary to find the strength to perceive the unpleasant situation positively, from which the useful conclusions then make for themselves. It is necessary to try to become strong, find confidence, find positive moments in difficult situations.
As is known from training on psychology, physical activity helps to get rid of depression well, increasing the level of endorphin in the blood. The researchers have shown that the hour training is generally useful for the entire body and is able to increase the level of hormones of happiness in the body of 7-10 times.
When depressed, there are some food products that will be useful for your body, having charged it with energy: banana, black chocolate, nuts, seeds. Also they will help get rid of this problem, thereby raising you the mood and configuring to a positive.
How to enjoy life every day - 4 simple steps how to learn to enjoy life
To enjoy life every day and gain confidence, it is necessary adhere to the main tips , learn to develop new abilities, embodying them in everyday life:
Search for happiness in every minute of life. The ability to enjoy life is a useful skill that many abuse. To master this art, you need to do what will bring you pleasure to appreciate the work, the case you do, be able to clearly talk about your opinion. After all, nothing interferes finds the happiness and pleasure from listening to the favorite song, the smiles of passerby, communicating with a good friend.
Change the idea of yourself . Think about yourself only positively, praise yourself more, rejoice in your small achievements, make yourself compliments, appreciate yourself, take care of your appearance. Holding to this method - the result will not make yourself wait, you will definitely see changes in yourself, as well as the relationship of others.
Move to the new goal . Think well what you want to achieve in the near future. It must be remembered that there are no unattainable goals, so approve good motivation specialists. If you put the desired level of your desires and strive for them, making everything you need, then you will get the desired result and at the same time make a lot of useful tasks, learn to get out of difficult situations, start believing in your abilities. The main thing is such a goal should not violate the ethical rules of society, you should not go on the heads of other people to achieve personal needs. This method will not bring joy.
Treat everything with a positive . No need to control every moment in your life, because it is not possible. It is necessary to behave as it is convenient for you to be able to fight with fear in different situations, treat the share of humor to everything, perceive more positively life, maintain their loved ones and do not make fun of other people's misses.
Advice how to learn to enjoy life and gain self-confidence
Tips for how to begin to enjoy life, to gain confidence a man and a woman - very simple. The only thing that will be needed is to start incarnate them in life today, make your first step. No need to spin in bustle and everyday worries.
Tune in to achieving success, learn how to find answers to the questions that arise and live by the present. Learn to rejoice yourself, improve your emotional forces and never envy other people, do not compare yourself with anyone.
Of the books, psychologists are known that the one who can raise itself and omit - this is us. The happiness of everyone depends on how much effort and time he is ready to spend to learn to rejoice in what is happening.
As a woman to overcome depression and learn to rejoice
For the treatment of depression in women, doctors appoint special antidepressants for a short time. A long course of treatment may adversely affect the body of a woman, after which it is very difficult for her to cope with small nerve disorders.
To begin with, you must independently try to get rid of such a disease, applying tips for overcoming depression at home. Often, the woman appears depression during pregnancy, which is expressed by neurosis, anxiety and a sense of fear. Many women have such stress and after the birth of a child, dismantle into a long postpartum depression.
First of all, a woman should believe that she is strong and can cope herself with any problems.
So that life is joyful, and it was easier to overcome depression, consider the following Tips for women :
1. It is desirable to arrange mental and physical unloading, you need to give your body rest;
2. Clear correctly, use useful food, spill well;
3. Go to where it is guaranteed to get positive emotions;
4. Communicate in a circle of pleasant, positive people, do not pay attention to small troubles;
5. Appreciate everything that you have every day;
6. Detect to rejoice at any trifle, overcome depression.
How to man find self-confidence and see positive
A man to acquire confidence is enough to believe in himself and be purposeful.
2. It is worth remembering that you do not need to look at others, imitate someone else's ideas, look like someone - be yourself! Try to do what you really need and will only benefit.
3. Confidence of a man in life directly depends on communication with positive, optimistic, strong people!
4. Confident man loves and appreciates himself, and his love applies to the surrounding people - and this serves for them with powerful support! People with a negative aura always carry it on your side, so you need to remember such people better to avoid. Pesssimism will negatively affect your aspirations, desires, begin to gradually turn into an unsuccessful man.
5. No need to criticize and blame yourself, it undertakes self-esteem and self-confidence.
How to enjoy life and smile despite not what tips
To learn to enjoy life, find confidence, it is easy to overcome depression, it is enough to determine important ways to help become happy.
Start giving joy to others, and she will return to you in double, feel about other people as you would like to treat you. You should not stop on the achieved, you need to always strive for a new one, the best.
Watch your health, correctly fidge, do sports and smile more often. Learn to love yourself, respect and appreciate yourself, surround yourself only by positive.
All these tips in life will help to overcome depression, gain confidence and learn to enjoy life, both a man and a woman.
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How to raise self-esteem and love yourself? How to gain confidence and believe in your strength? What tips and ways to improve self-esteem work?
Greetings to you, dear readers! With you Denis Kudarin.
It has long been proven by scientists that self-esteem is one of the most important factors for achieving success in life and feeling confidence.
Low self-esteem leads to poverty, depression and sense of senselessness of their own existence.
If you or your acquaintances face this problem, today I will share with you effective ways to resolve it, which helped me personally.
All techniques and techniques described in the article are recommended by leading psychologists and just successful people who use them every day in their own life.
Using them in practice, you can not only become more confident, but in the end, even increase your income and even start a business.
Let's start, friends!
1. What is self-esteem: definition and its influence on our life
To achieve success in any area of its activities, a person needs to be confident and be able to convince others to be right.
People with low self-esteem cannot be happy by definition: all of their existence consists of doubts, disappointments and self-confidence. Meanwhile, the bright, rich life, life passes by, getting down to those who do not doubt their own rightness and confidently walks to their goal.
A man with low self-esteem considers himself not worthy of happiness, so subconsciously inferior in everything else. To change the situation in your favor, you need to change myself - there is no other way.
In this article, I will tell you why a person's self-esteem is so important which reasons affect its decline, and how to increase the self-esteem of a man, a woman (girl), a teenage in the most effective methods.
Self-satisfaction - This is the presentation of an individual about the importance of his personality towards other people and the assessment of their own qualities - advantages and disadvantages.
Self-assessment is extremely important for the full functioning of the person in society and achieving various life goals - success, self-realization, family happiness, spiritual and material well-being.
Self-assessment functions are as follows:
Protective - ensures the stability and relative independence of the individual from the opinions of others;
Regulatory - gives a person a person to solve the tasks of a personality choice;
Developing - Provides an impetus to the development of personality.
The assessment of our personality surrounding - in particular, parents, peers, friends is played in the early formation of self-assessment. Ideally, self-esteem should be based only on the own opinion of the individual about himself, but in fact, there are many different factors on it.
Self-esteem - the attitude of a person to itself: to its capabilities, physical and spiritual qualities. An adequate assessment of their own capabilities helps to avoid mistakes and at the same time is an incentive to further development.
Psychologists believe that the ideal self-esteem is the most accurate assessment by the person of his abilities.
The understated self-esteem causes a person to doubt, thinking and take incorrect solutions, and too high leads to a large number of errors.
In most cases, we are dealing with the underestimation of the person of their capabilities, which is why a person is not able to fully reveal its potential and does not understand how to increase self-esteem.
A well-known coach in the field of psychology of success Brian Tracy believes that low self-esteem is the main cause of man's financial failure. After all, if you feel bad, you have no confidence in your abilities, then you are doomed to be poor, but you don't even have to dream about your own business.
On the contrary, the growth of self-esteem leads to an increase in your income and earn more money. So if you have financial problems, be sure to look for the reason in your emotional state.
The pathological manifestation of the understated self-esteem is a complex of inferiority.
It is self-esteem - the key to achieving success in any field of human activity. Self-confidence leads to the adoption of important and timely decisions, and the underestimation of their forces reduces the level of person's personal energy, forces him to constantly doubt itself and instead of actions - to think about action.
2. Why is it important to love yourself and what will happen if this is not done
Increase self-esteem - it means to love yourself: take yourself as you are with all the disadvantages and flaws. There are plenty of cons: self-confident man in itself and differs from the ever doubting and uncertain that he sees not only the shortcomings, but also of dignity, and at the same time knows how to present himself to others.
If you do not like yourself, how can others love you? It is known that consciously and subconscious people strive to contact and communicate with self-confident personalities. It is precisely such individuals who are most often chosen to business partners, friends and in husbands (or wives).
If you doubt the connant for any trifle, you automatically program yourself for further failures and make an increasingly difficult decision-making process. Learn to praise yourself, forgive yourself and love yourself - you will see how the attitude of others will change.
Signs understated (-) self-esteem
A person with understated self-esteem usually manifests such qualities as:
excessive self-criticism and dissatisfaction with themselves;
increased sensitivity to criticism and opinions around;
constant indecision and fear to allow a mistake;
envy to successes of others;
Passionate desire to please;
hostility to others;
The constant protective position and the need to justify in their actions;
Pessimism, negative worldview.
Individual with understated self-esteem perceives temporary difficulties and failures as permanent and makes incorrect conclusions. The worse we treat yourself, the more negatively relate to us the surrounding: this leads to alienation, depression and other psycho-emotional disorders.
3. High self-esteem and self-confidence - an important factor in achieving success
Before I tell about how to improve self-esteem, I want to emphasize the importance of love for myself to achieve success and well-being. For some reason, it is believed that self - sin or at least something that should be avoided.
In fact, the lack of love and respect for their own personality just gives rise to numerous complexes and internal conflicts.
If a person has a low opinion about himself, it is unlikely that the surrounding will be considered differently. And vice versa - self-confident people are usually highly evaluated by others: they are listening to their opinion, they seek to communicate with them and cooperate. Having learned to respect myself, we will gain respect for others, and also learn to adequately treat our opinion about us.
Signs high (+) self-esteem
People with healthy, high self-esteem possess the following advantages:
take their physical look as it is;
They are not afraid to make mistakes and learn to them;
quietly perceive criticism and compliments;
know how to communicate, do not experience robusts when communicating with unfamiliar people;
Respect the opinion of others, but appreciate their own look at things;
take care of their physical and emotional well-being;
Success in their endeavors.
Beliefs and self-esteem are the same factors to achieve success and happiness, like the sun and water for the plant: a personal growth is impossible without them. Low self-esteem deprives a person of perspective and hope for changes.
4. Low self-esteem - 5 main reasons
The factors that directly or indirectly affect our attitude towards themselves, a great set. These are genetic features, and external data, and social status, and marital status. Below we will look at the 5 most common causes of low self-esteem.
Cause 1. Misquainment in the family
Our attitude towards himself directly depends on the right upbringing. If the parents did not encourage us, but on the contrary, they scolded and constantly compared with others, we simply won't have a reason for love for yourself - there will be no soil on which faith will be based in their abilities.
The decline in self-esteem and the lack of confidence in his own words and actions affects the criticism by the parents of any initiatives, undertakings and actions. Even matured, a person who was constantly criticized in childhood, subconsciously continues to be afraid of mistakes.
Parents (teachers, coaches) should know how to increase the self-esteem of the child, which suffers from doubts and insecurity.
The best way - praise, unobtrusive encouragement. It is enough several times sincerely praise the baby for the correctly performed school task, diligently drawn drawing, and his self-esteem will inevitably increase.
Psychologists say that the family is for the child the center of the world: it is there that all the future characteristics of an adult person are laid. Passivity, lethargy, uncertainty, other negative qualities - direct reflection of parental suggestions and installations.
Usually self-esteem is higher for the only children and those were born first. Other children often have a "low brother complex", when parents constantly compare the youngest child with the eldest.
The ideal for adequate self-esteem is the one in which the mother is always calm in a good mood, and the father is demanding, fair and has continuous authority.
Cause 2. Frequent failures in childhood
Nobody insured against failures, the main thing is our attitude. A strong traumatic event may affect the psyche in the form of a complex of guilt and reduce self-esteem. For example, some children accuse themselves in the divorce of parents or their frequent quarrels: in the future, the feeling of guilt is transformed into constant doubts and the inability to make a decision.
In childhood, quite harmless events acquire a space scale. For example, taking the second, and not the first place in the competition, the adult athlete will sigh and continue training with a double strength, and the child can get a psychological trauma for life, especially if parents do not show a proper understanding of the situation.
What does low self-esteem eat in childhood? Failures, mistakes, ridicule of peers, careless remarks of adults (parents first). As a result, the teenager forms the opinion that he is bad, unlucky, defective, and a false sense of guilt appears for his actions.
Cause 3. No clear goals in life
If you have nothing to strive in life, you do not need to strain and make volitional efforts. The lack of clear goals, laziness, following with standard philistine imperatives, is easy and does not require manifestation of personal qualities. Such a person does not plan to become successful and rich, he is passive in its essence.
Often people with low self-esteem live on autopilot, random. They are satisfied with gray tones, an inconspicable lifestyle, the lack of bright colors - there is no desire to get out of the swamp. Such people cease to pay attention to their own appearance, income, cease to dream and strive to change. Naturally, self-esteem in such a situation is not just low, but absent at all.
Growing, a person becomes passive, and then all these problems shifts on his family when he marries (get married).
Here the conclusion suggests itself with itself: to increase self-esteem with a man and a woman, that is, an adult person is also necessary as a child. After all, it all starts from childhood, and then nothing changes if an adult does not take their efforts for this.
Cause 4. Unhealthy social environment
If people are surrounded by people without certain purposes in life, staying in constant spiritual anabiosis, it is unlikely that you will have a desire for internal transformation.
High self-esteem and ambitions appear where there are examples for imitation - if all your friends and acquaintances are accustomed to living in the shade, without showing initiatives, then you are most likely to be completely arranged.
If you notice that you are surrounded by pathologically, everyone got used to complain about life, gossip, condemn others and excessively philosophy without reason - it is worth thinking, but on the path whether you with these people?
After all, such people can become energy vampires for you and prevent you from wake up the true potential.
If you feel that such a trend takes place - change this environment or at least limit the communication with it.
It is best to communicate by those people who are already successful, has its own business and knows how to earn. We have already written earlier on how to make money, we recommend familiarizing yourself with this article.
Cause 5. Defects of appearance and health
Low self-esteem often arises in children with defects of appearance or innate diseases.
Even if parents behave correctly towards such a child, it can largely influence the social environment - first of all, the opinion of peers.
A typical example is an excessive weight, which in kindergarten or school give offensive nicknames. Low self-esteem in such cases is virtually ensured if you do not accept appropriate measures.
In this case, it is worth trying to eliminate the existing shortcomings, and if it is impossible, you need to start developing other qualities that will make a person (child) more developed, charismatic and confident.
If a child is overweight and appropriate unattractive appearance, then with the right approach to the development of its abilities and talents, this lack of advantage.
Perhaps he will have the ability to sport (heavy athletics or struggle, or boxing), or vice versa, he will be able to become a popular actor with the type inherent in it.
In general, there are thousands of examples where people with enormous physical disabilities have achieved worldwide recognition, created happy families and at the same time live the lives that "healthy" can only dream of.
The most striking example is the example - Nick Vuychich , world famous speaker and preacher. Nick was born without hands and without legs Naturally experienced a huge complex of inferiority and even wanted to commit suicide.
But, thanks to the power of the will and the desire to live, achieved public recognition and helped thousands of people around the world to find themselves and cope with psychological difficulties.
Now Nick dollar millionaire and lovers of thousands of people, because he helped them change their lives. Working on his self-esteem, you can achieve unprecedented heights and even repeat the success of Nika Vuily, despite the fact that now your condition may not be the best.
And about how rich people think and what you need to become a millionaire, we have already written here.
5. How to increase self-esteem and confidence - 7 powerful ways
How to raise self-esteem and love yourself? There are many ways to make yourself believe in your own strength, but I chose the seven most reliable and efficient options.
Method 1. Signing and Communication with Successful People
Since a person is a social being, it completely depends on his environment. How to believe in yourself and increase self-esteem with other people? Very simple - you need to change your environment.
Above, I have already written that communication with the misinterpretation, lethargic and lazy people without ambitions and aspirations to changes - a direct path to a decrease in self-esteem and the absence of life motivation.
If you drastically change the circle of communication and become in contact with successful, purposeful, self-confident people, you will almost immediately feel how they are changing for the better. Gradually, a self-esteem will be returned to you, and all the qualities, without which it is impossible to achieve success.
Communicating with successful and prosperous people, you will learn to appreciate the individuality (including your own), it will become different about personal time, gain a goal and begin to achieve success on your own.
Method 2. Visiting events, trainings, seminars
In any city, events are held, trainings or seminars, on which specialists teach all those who want self-confidence and improve self-esteem.
Experts on applied psychology for several months will be able from a timid, indecisive individual to make a volitional, satisfied and purposeful person: the main thing is to have an initial impetus and a desire to change.
There are many competent books in which in detail, with examples and explanations, it is described about the need for love and respect for oneself: if you want a change, acquaintance with such literature will be very productive.
I recommend reading the following books: Brian Tracy "self-esteem", Sharon Vegshid-Cruz "How much do you stand? How to learn to love and respect yourself. "
Particularly relevant to enhance the female self-esteem will be the books of Helen Anteline "Charm of Femininity" and Louise Hay "Heal their lives".
Viewing a video content on this topic - documentary and artistic films that contribute to improving self-esteem.
Method 3. Exit from the "Comfort Zone" - committing unusual actions
The desire of a person to escape from problems in the zone of personal comfort is quite understandable. It is much easier in difficult situations to console yourself with sweets, alcohol, savoring your own impotence. It is much more difficult to accept the challenge face to face and make something that we are unusual.
At first, it may seem that outside the comfort zone is a hostile and inhospitable world, but then the understanding that real life, full of beauty, adventure and positive emotions, is exactly where you have not yet been.
Staying in the usual conditions is similar to life in an invisible cage, from which you are afraid to go out simply because you are used to it. Having learned to leave the "comfort zone" and at the same time remain calm, assembled and balanced, you will gain a powerful incentive to raise self-esteem and form your new image.
You can start with small - for example, stop after work to sit in front of the TV, and buy a subscription to a gym, come across running, yoga, meditation.
Put the task - to learn from a half year unfamiliar language or today to get to know the girl you like. Do not be afraid if the first time you do not have everything will be obtained - but new sensations and improvement of self-esteem are guaranteed.
Method 4. Refusal of excessive self-criticism
Starting to engage in self-vacation, to reinstate itself and "eat" for mistakes, disadvantages of appearance, failure in personal life, you will achieve several goals at once:
Loose a huge amount of energy. You will not lose attention to myself, and there will be time for other, more creative and decent tasks;
Learn how to take yourself as you are. You are the only and unique person on this planet. So why compare ourselves with others? It is better to focus on achieving your own goals according to your potential and your idea of happiness;
Learn to see the positive features of your personality. . Instead of winning the negative, purposefully find the strengths and work on their development.
In the end, any failures, disappointment and errors can be paid in their favor using as a life experience.
Method 5. Sports and knowledge of a healthy lifestyle
In the course of the experiments conducted by European scientists, it was established that one of the easiest and most effective ways to increase self-esteem - to play sports, physical education or activities aimed at improving health and well-being.
A healthy body is a capacity of a healthy spirit and the right thoughts, and on the contrary: a person, heavy on the rise, with a non-war body, is difficult to make decisions and act independently.
Starting to play sports, a person begins to perceive his appearance less critical and more respectfully to himself. At the same time, the increase in self-esteem does not depend on the results of training: even if the changes are insignificant, the process of occupy itself is important.
The more active you exercise, the better you begin to treat yourself.
Any physical activity (especially for a person working in the office) is an opportunity to gain confidence and love yourself. This phenomenon is quite a scientific explanation: during sports, a person is intensively produced by dopamines - neurotransmitters responsible for encouraging (they are sometimes called "hormones of joy").
Biochemical changes have a positive effect on the psyche and increase our self-esteem.
Method 6. Listening to affirmations
Affirmations are one of the most effective ways to reprogram their own consciousness. In psychology, under affirmations, brief verbal formulas are understood, which, with repeated repetition, create a positive installation in a person's subconscious. In the future, this installation contributes to changing the character traits and personality in the direction of improvement.
Affirmations are always formulated as already accomplished fact that causes a person to accept them as a given and think accordingly. If our subconscious mind considers us confident, successful and purposeful, then gradually we really become such.
Typical examples of affirmations to improve self-esteem: "I am the owner of my life," "I can enjoy everything that I wish," "I believe in myself, so everything comes to me freely and without effort." These linguistic formulas can be repeated independently or listening to in the player: the main thing in this practice is regularity.
C read these phrases into the microphone by writing tracks from them from several minutes and listen in your free time. This technology is recommended by Western psychologists and has proven its high efficiency.
Method 7. Doing the diary of success and achievements
Raise the self-esteem for teenagers, men and women will help the diary of their own victories and achievements.
Get this diary right now and put everything there, which you managed to achieve a day (week, month). Successborne diary is a powerful stimulating tool that will make you believe in yourself and will allow you to increase your own efficiency repeatedly.
Each day, make recordings about any of your victories, even small.
Transferred grandmother across the road;
I wanted to eat harmful food, but restrained;
Woke up and went on time (according to plan);
Made a gift to his beloved (beloved);
Earned 10% more than in the previous month;
All these "little things" belong to your personal success, be sure to make them in your business diary and read it regularly.
If you record there only 5 simple things a day, then a month this will already be 150 of your achievements!
Not so little for one month, agree?!
In one of our articles it was written about how to become rich and successful from scratch, and the maintenance of a diary of success could be the first step towards this.
6. Public opinion addiction is a factor destroying the person: We defeat the uncertainty
Public opinion can destroy our lives if they give it too much importance.
Constructive criticism indicating specific errors is useful and helps in development, but completely depend on the opinions of others - a big mistake.
Learn to appreciate your own opinion and your own look at things, then the words of others will cease to be so important for you. If you, committing any actions think primarily about what people will say how they will look at you, it is unlikely to succeed in their endeavors.
Let public opinion depends on you, and not you from him. Improve your own will and think less about the consequences.
How to become more confident in yourself - practical exercises
For the development of self-confidence, I recommend to perform the following 2 exercises:
"Himself a clown." Preparation: You ridiculously dress, such as curlers, huge tie, funny clothes. Then go out into the street, go to the stores, in general, behave as if it is your everyday look. Naturally, you will feel discomfort in this form. But at the same time, you will have a psychological threshold of critical perception of you surrounding;
"Orator in Life." Try to act publicly as possible. If at work the head asks someone to prepare a presentation, organize an event or go on a business trip with an important report - show the initiative and take these functions on yourself. If you have a fear of public speeches, the ways to overcome it have already been described in this article.
Both of these exercises are associated with exit from the comfort zone. Our brain begins to think that such behavior is normal for us and these things no longer cause such stress as before. Remember, the best way to get rid of fear is to do what you are afraid!
7. How to find yourself and learn how to manage your self-esteem - 5 important advice
And now 5 short tips for managing self-esteem:
Stop comparing yourself with others;
Stop scolding and criticizing yourself;
Communicate with positive people;
Do you like;
Act, and not think about action!
Remember that you are a unique person with great potential and unlimited possibilities. Improving self-esteem is one way to reveal your ability to fully.
8. Test for self-esteem - determine the level of attitude towards yourself today
My self-esteem test consists of several simple questions that you need to answer only "Yes" or "No". When you do it, consider the number of positive and negative answers.
You often scold yourself for errors (yes / no);
You like to suck with friends (friends) and discuss common acquaintances (yes / no);
You do not have clear goals and you do not plan your life (yes / no);
You do not engage in physical education and sports (yes / no);
You like to worry on trifles (yes / no);
Once in an unfamiliar company, you prefer to remain "in the shade" (yes / no);
When meeting the opposite sex, you cannot support the conversation (yes / no);
When you criticize it in depressions (yes / no);
You like to criticize people and often envy someone else's success (yes / no);
You can easily hurt a careless word (yes / no).
The key to the Tesu for self-esteem:
Replies "Yes" from the 1st to 3 : Congratulations, you have Normal self-esteem.
Replies "Yes" - more than 3 : you understated self-esteem, work over it.
9. How to raise self-esteem and attract success
Most people suffer from understated self-esteem, but also an overestimated self-esteem can become an obstacle to achieving your goals. A man with a low self-esteem in the depths of the soul is confident that something is wrong with him that he is not worthy and does not deserve happiness, money, success. And people with overwhelmed self-esteem believe that they are worthy of the best, but often not ready to work on it - they are waiting that everything should come in itself. Both are the problem when the life goals are reached.
To achieve the success of Esoteric, they advise to clean the brain from the garbage, forgive everyone and begin to meditate. Financiers advise just to postpone and competently invest money. But for some reason, most people do not work these tips.
If you want to be successful and start making good Denlie you want to be successful and start making good Denli you want to be successful and start earning good Denli you want to be successful and start making good money, first of all you need to realize your value and get rid of internal conflicts . To understand the mechanism, as it works, how the wrong internal installations prevent you from loved yourself and achieve your financial goals, becoming a happy and successful person, come to a free master class from Pavel Wheel "Formula of Abundance".
Now you know what to believe in yourself, not afraid of criticism and adequately evaluate your own talents - it is quite possible and not difficult at all. The main thing is the depth desire to change and the ability to take the first step in the right direction!
Realizing that you need it, you will be able to change your life without exaggeration, to achieve recognition, increase your earnings and it is possible to even open your business.
Finally, I recommend you to watch the video of Veronica Stepanova on how to increase self-esteem:
Successes you and love yourself!
Article author: Maria Zagaininov
Writer, copywriter and editor. I am writing about business, investment and cryptocurrency
You can try all the time to please others around, to help everyone, without requiring nothing in return, try to please everyone and be useful, but will you feel free and happy? The lack of self-relief is always reflected on the main spheres of life. The relations are not glued, the work is one stress, with the money of the problem, and the surrounding only think that you would get from you. You truly be happy and successful can only be when you begin to like yourself and, finally, aware of your value. What should I do for this?
1. Do not criticize yourself for failures Stop scolding yourself for the fact that something has not happened. Every time the situation is not on the plan, you get valuable experience! We learn from our mistakes, and it is better to find 100 ways, how to do no need to sit and guess "But what should I do in this situation?". Try, try, erase. What if it gets better than planned?
2. No need to look for shortcomings Each of us at least once in life was thinking about what would like to change something. But this is exactly your true desire, and not imposed by society? Are you sure that you will begin to look at the reflection in the mirror with pleasure? If you are happy from this, do it! But I assure you - this will not affect your emptiness inside. From this you will not love yourself more! You just pack yourself in the best phanto on your taste. So understand that you are unique! Look more often in the mirror and consider yourself from all sides, so you get used to your body. Take your body as it is!
3. Stop winding yourself Many constantly terrorize themselves with negative thoughts, imagining the situation much worse than it really is. They always inflate small problems to incredibly huge. Why are you once again alarming yourself? Calm down! Live in the present time, right here and now. Remember the strength of thought, our thoughts are material, what do you think about something and attract.
4. Praise yourself Every time you can't do something, you criticize yourself in full program. But when everything comes out as needed or even better, for some reason they do not praise herself. Think, criticism makes you laid out at full capacity? It is unlikely, it is rather upset. Another thing, nice words, after them you are ready to turn the mountains! Work out the habit, praise yourself every time the desired result is obtained, the goal is achieved. The result will please you!
5. Self-pressure Start every morning with a conversation with a reflection in the mirror. Smile and tell me some pleasant, motivating phrases. Squeeze your reflection in the mirror, configure it to achieve the necessary goals. Remind yourself about your best qualities, praise yourself for the execution of planned affairs. As previously stated, much, what happens around us depends on our thoughts, what you think about something to yourself and attract.
6. Free yourself from unnecessary Get rid of finally from too much in your life - from unpleasant people who carry only some negative emotions, from boring cases that do not bring any pleasure, and all that sucks out of you all the energy and at the same time nothing is good in itself. Fill out this space by helping you get better, will delight and improve you.
7. Examine yourself Write down on paper your strengths and weaknesses. Look, but good qualities in you more than bad. So why don't you notice them and concentrate all your attention only on the weaknesses? We are not perfect, accept it. Think how you can develop your best qualities and drown out the weaknesses.
8. Learn to say "no" Every day you are struggling to everyone to please help, if only those surrounding did not think anything wrong about you. But Start finally respect yourself and appreciate your time. Learn to refuse to people if you are not interested in helping them. The most important part in this issue is to stop being guilty after refusal. Refuse is normal, you do not have to match someone's expectations. Think first of all about yourself and your desires.
9. Speak through fears Each of us has situations, the idea of which is not the most pleasant emotions. Everyone has its own - fear of opposing the public, the fear of someone to open up and much more. It is necessary to fight with fears, they brake us without allowing to fully develop. Take risk and try, maybe nothing terrible in this and not? And if you still have, then why not try again, because you have already passed through it, and therefore overcome it again.
10. Rejoice yourself We are accustomed to the day on the day to use inconspicuous, ordinary things, but how do you love yourself if you walk at home in older pants and stretched T-shirt? Forget about it! Look so as not to shudder each time passing by the mirror. Use every day the most beautiful kitchenware that you have at home, and not just on holidays. You are tasty and useful, and not "to cook only faster." Appreciate yourself, love yourself and take yourself every day with similar trifles.
How to gain self-confidence ? How complicated and the long journey should be fused to raise it and grow in yourself?
I wonder how faith begins in his strength and confidence in his own personality? Your opinion?
It turns out that confident behavior is the result of confident thinking. What kind of man is posing, so looks like. And it acts on the basis of the internal installations, ideas about oneself.
How to become sure?
You can start with the simplest - to portray a confident person in any life situations. In the supermarket, in the pool, on the street, among colleagues, in the subway. There will be a well-known law of transition of quantity into qualitative changes. You will be more confident behavior anymore, you will feel more confident with each action. Step, one more, next. And the process went! Every step is better, more natural.
So you can overcome your thinking, looped on patterns of uncertain behavior. Easy and unobtrusively can be rebuilt by presenting themselves as an actor who selflessly and talentedly plays a role. You decide whenever you release the actor on the stage when you turn the "switch" to turn off the unsure of the shy personality. You fully control the situation. We decided that at the party you would be embarrassed - there will be unfamiliar people, and act. Experiment well! With all my might! Tired? Switch "Switch" - choose confident behavior, communicate with equal, with dignity and self-esteem.
What to look confident?
One hundred percent in the history of your life was the moments when you were a confident person.
Perhaps - in childhood, when you helped younger sister to fasten sandals or at school when the learned poem was told. Or in adolescence, when we won in sports.
Or in situations where you were among loved ones and relatives, when they opposed the audience or talked with some kind of person.
Play in the memory of intonation, as you said, how to breathe how they moved, how did you gesticulated, in which posture were? How did the voice sounded that the face was expressed, what sensations were?
Now, in order to "enable" a confident person in yourself, repeat all this, copy the posture, tempo and speech volume, gestures - enter the right state. You don't need to invent anything, you have already been in this place - in the body of a confident man, you were such a person, now you remember it and do our natural state.
When you are sure of yourself, the surrounding perceive your dignity, confidence in yourself, self-esteem. And even more strengthen you in these sensations.
How to find self-confidence? 15 effective advice.
Space. A confident man is well fading space. Completely occupy, proposed chair or chair, fold back on the back, use armrests. Make wide gestures, with a scope, expanding the area of its influence. Nature from the uncertain, which, on the contrary, seeks to get sick, bake, take as little space as possible, sit on the edge of the chair, is limited to pie gem.
Without fuss. Is there a confident person for you? Who is it? Margaret Thatcher? Angelina Jolie? Ivan Urgant? Silvestre Stallone? Or someone else? Imagine your ideal that sniffs nervously on the chair, it strives, intensively turtled the tie, kogolitits the drum fraction on the table. Yes, it is difficult to imagine. Confidence is incompatible with a fuss. Remove it.
Direct pose. In any position, standing and sitting, keep a flat posture. It allows you to emit confidence, feel it and look a confident person. Practice: Chest forward, shoulders back, keep your head smoothly in the horizontal and vertical plane. Imagine that the string comes from your macushus, which pulls you into heaven. Remember this posture and look with her.
Tempo speech. When someone is taratitis, quickly-quickly says, it is difficult for him to be confident and independent. A confident man speaks with feeling, with a sense, with an arrangement, without tension. He knows that he will not be traveled, he will be given to speak. Middle speech pace, smooth. Take yourself a rule, the more you worry, it is nervous, the slower and calmly say, do pauses. Speak as if communicating with the child and it is important for you that he understands you.
I, I am again. Speak in the first person. Use, phrase: I think I think I decided, I found out, I support, I disagree, I think differently. Bretfully express exactly your opinion, do not cover up the streamlined and impersonal "we", "all", "Joint decision", "each". Avoid excuses!
Eye contact. A confident person transfers the center of attention to itself on others. He is not looked at himself, he is interested in the interlocutor and the world around him. Therefore, a direct open look is very important and helps to be sure, makes it possible to understand your interest to people. During communication, you connect not only rumor, but also an additional channel of perception, "listen to eyes", more clearly perceive and understand the interlocutor.
Dignity. Take an example from the king of the beast of Leo. What is his plastic, strength and power in movements. Slowly, with dignity, confident, elegant. To be confident, slow down the movement. Move royally. Your movements must be smooth, meaningful, thoughtful, leisurely.
Taking yourself and others. Be calm, friendly and friendly, even if the interlocutor disagrees with you or you with him. Believe in yourself, in your point of view. Your goal is not to make people think just like you. Your goal is to be respected.
Gesture of a confident man - Spire-gesture. The tips of the fingertips of one hand touches the tips of the other hand at a sharp angle, forming a spire. This is a signal of confidence and calm. Use it as an additional way of confident behavior.
Do not strive for everyone to please. Good need to be, above all, for yourself. Your confidence and self-esteem should not depend on how when and how to evaluate and accept you.
Pause. Uncertain people fear silence, fear silence and quickly interrupt him. No need to "climb out of the skin" to fill every second, albeit meaningless, but chatter. Before answering, take a pause. Little. One - two seconds. Think about what you heard that I wanted to convey to you the interlocutor. It will give you confidence and help own the situation in communication.
Laughter. Do not giggle. You are not in the circus. Poghogging is a sign of uncertainty and instability. Appreciate good jokes: Smile or calmly laugh.
Merchant disease. If you are listening to the interlocutor and agree with it, you do not need to nourish your heads continuously - you are not a "Chinese Dwarf". You are a serious, confident person. A pair of head slopes in consent is quite sufficient.
ТAyino and obvious. Being in any situation: alone or with people, in the rays of the Sun or in the dark - do not make something that you will be ashamed. Act in accordance with your principles, do not curvate the soul, and it will reward you the basis of the foundations on which self-esteem will be held, self-esteem and high self-esteem.
I do not know and I'm not afraid. If you want to trust you, never be afraid to admit that you do not know something. "I have not come across such a task yet. Now I have no answer to this question. " It is impossible to know everything. Realize this and feel free to say that you do not know. This will help you even more strengthen self-confidence.
Friends, everyone has absolutely all needed, in order to be confident, starting from today, from the present moment. You do not need to read additional literature for this, sign up for a reception to a psychologist, pass trainings. Just decide to be a confident person, click the switch and turn on the new person. Successes!
Video for you "confidence is the key to victory."
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Learn how to become confident by a person. Tips of psychologists.
How to believe in yourself: Psychologist Tips
Confident people easier to ask for an increase in the salary, to get acquainted with a pretty girl or a guy, to achieve intended goals. At the same time, people inherent in themselves and their forces cannot achieve the same heights for the reason that they are afraid to be rejected, they are afraid to receive a refusal. They are confident that nothing will happen, so do not even try.
Henry Ford said: " When you think you can, and when you think you can't, - in both cases you are right. " This phrase is not better reflecting two opposite people - confident and insecure.
Causes of uncertainty:
The lack of faith in itself is often a consequence of excessive criticism of those surrounding, self-critics.
Life and routine also often lead to it.
The problem of insecurity can be at the upbringing. Many in childhood imposed thoughts that they would not be able to, it was not for them, do not even try and all in such a spirit.
If you feel that you fell into a dead end that your work and actions are meaningless, and the life is tired, it means that it is time to change something. Believe in yourself and start living like that only I dreamed, you can. But for this you need to work on yourself and life plants, change your thinking. Of course, hard work is heavy, but if you try, everything will definitely work out. Below the advice of psychologists to help gain self-confidence.
Tip 1: Do not compare yourself with others
If you have a habit of comparing yourself with other people, urgently need to get rid of it. When you think that some person is better, smarter, more beautiful, your self-esteem falls even more. And your goal, as you remember, increase self-esteem.
Important: Comparison of yourself with other people can lead to the development of complexes, reduced self-esteem, envy.
Remember, there is always a person who succeeds in something, it is better to understand you in the subtleties of work, prettier external, etc. But this does not mean that you are a nikudy man and do not deserve the best. You also have strengths, you just need to reveal them. For some, you may also be an example, just do not suspect it.
To get rid of the habit of constantly comparing yourself with someone, do this:
Compare yourself not with other people, but with yourself, just yesterday. For example, today you ran better than yesterday. Today you have become kinder than yesterday. Check out your achievements mentally.
Look at people not with envy, but with interest. Analyze what qualities you like in person. Think that helps him be so interesting, lucky. Consider the personality not as an object envy, but as a teacher. Make the right conclusions and start developing your best qualities.
Remember, it is better to be not a copy, but an original version of yourself. Do not copy the manners of behavior, communication, the appearance of the person with whom you compare yourself.
Tip 2: Do not criticize yourself too strictly
A person can become the stringent criticism of himself. Permanent guards, endless self-criticism, concentration on minor errors leads to the fact that a person can be very suffering.
IMPORTANT: Just as non-recognition of any criticism in your address, self-criticism can adversely affect self-esteem, faith in itself. From this greatly spawns, even serious depression is possible.
If you are in the number of people who constantly reproach for what they did, and they could do it differently, stop doing it.
Remember, mistakes make all people. Not only one who does nothing. Forgive yourself small disadvantages, incorrect solutions, actions. Just admit to your wrong, forgive yourself and do not return more to this situation. Stop dig in what happened and edge yourself. Ideal people do not exist.
If you are not ready to put up with the situation, instead of self-critics, send the energy to solve the problem. For example, you blame yourself for overweight. Stop to condemn yourself, put the point in this self-destruction and start doing everything from that day to gain the desired forms.
Experience - the son of difficult mistakes. Perceive failures as experience and no more. Instead of lowering hands, make the right conclusions and move on.
Tip 3: Choose your environment
The despair and the lack of faith leads to the criticism of other people. If in your circle of communication there are such people who constantly criticize you, they say that you will not work out and pull down, it is worth a communication to zero.
You should not perceive the advice literally, otherwise you can lose all friends and acquaintances. There are people who can express a truthful opinion, even though it may be hurt. But they are ready to help in a difficult moment, can praise and maintain if necessary. There are no such people to lose.
Surround yourself with positive people who can rejoice at every day in their lives. You yourself will not notice how you will become the same positive person. And the positive is one of the steps towards success and increased self-esteem.
Get rid of themselves from communicating with people who constantly complain about life, forever everyone is unhappy. From such supports support and motivation will not wait, they are impregnated with a negative and will carry it into your life. And you do not need it, with this approach of confidence will not add.
Tip 4: Put the tasks
Proper thinking that is not supported by anything, lives long. Therefore, you need to act. To increase your self-esteem, you need to set you tasks and must be performed.
Tasks and goals should be both global requiring a lot of time and effort for implementation and daily. Start with small:
Put in front of us tasks every day.
You can record them in a notebook, and then mark the checkboxes.
The tasks should be simple - run 1 km more, to make a good deed, to fulfill more work today, to learn ten new foreign words, do not eat harmful food.
Simple tasks are easier to perform, and the result will be visible faster.
Do not forget to praise yourself for completed task.
Periodically indulge yourself for the task. It may be a bonus in the form of a shopping, a trip to a movie or a museum, or what you like.
The first victories will strengthen faith in itself and give the charge of motivation for more significant tasks.
Tip 5: Do not dwell
Important: No wonder in Christianity is a terrible sin. Many seemingly hopeless situations are solved if approaching it with optimism and faith in the best.
Do not configure yourself to a negative result, always say yourself: "I can", "I am worthy of this", "I am - the best." Believe yourself, and you will not notice how your gait will become more confident, and the shoulders will disappear.
For example, if you are going to the interview, you should not configure yourself in advance for a failure. The man's unsure of itself will say: "I will not take right away." Confident will not even allow the shadow of doubt that this position is already in his pocket. This is a big difference between two dissimilar people. And, as a rule, a different result.
Insecurity is felt, even if you have not been familiar with the person. Let you be an excellent specialist, you may refuse only because you were on interview confused and uncertain.
Treat life with a positive. Learn to enjoy the trifles, feel free to show your good mood to others, then your life will be filled with bright colors, you will become more confident in yourself, feel the location of other people. A cheerful person is easier to get acquainted, find friends, to meet a girl.
Tip 6: Do not shift responsibility on other
Transferring responsibility on other people often follows from pity to themselves. Learn to take responsibility for your actions, words, actions, for your life.
People who are not able to take responsibility are always to blame for other people, weather, circumstances. Do not be such a person. If you decide to do so, not otherwise, defend your position and stop feeling uncomfortable if your actions do not like to someone. It is your life, and you are her owner. When you take the brazards of the board in your hands, you will feel much more confident.
Important: Get rid of a feeling of pity for yourself. This negative feeling is an obstacle to the enhancement of self-esteem, it pulls down. A person who constantly regrets himself is doomed to failure.
Tip 7: Take yourself with all the shortcomings and advantages
Do not put unattainable goals, be realistic. Love yourself with all your shortcomings, take yourself as you like. Try to the most honestly formulate all your qualities, it is not necessary to criticize - just understand and accept. Knowing his weak and strengths, you will be much easier to live, attribute to life situations and interact with colleagues.
Do not detract your advantages. If you are praised, you will be able to take compliments. Praise yourself for the work done well, for small victories and achievements.
Surround yourself with good things: prepare for yourself delicious and useful food, admire nature, walk in the fresh air, do sports, look good movies, read books, be sure to follow your appearance. Create decent and pleasant conditions for personal growth and good life.
Tip 8: Challenge your fears
This advice will help move from theory to practice. First, analyze and decide what fears you interfere in life, which does not allow you to be confident in yourself. Or what would you like, but you do not do it, because you are not sure about your abilities. You have to deal with these fears.
If you feel uncertainty because of excess weight, go to the gym. Employe your fear of being not accepted, do not be afraid to look like a white rorone. Many of the tightened and slender people were once the same, and maybe even larger. It is difficult to take the first step, then you will be glad that you could overcome your fear.
If you are tired of loneliness, but terribly make sure to get acquainted, you will have to step towards this fear. Without it, it is not possible to change your situation, and everything can stay in our places. Even if you give up in your acquaintance, do not be mistaken, try again. Once you will achieve success.
Tip 9: Take a favorite thing
Unloved work is able to suppress human self-esteem. Look at people who love their work, they like the wings behind their back and even if not everything turns out, but the person is pleased. And if you are forced to engage in an unloved business for a long time, it is not surprising that there is no optimism and faith in yourself.
Adult man most often can not just take and quit his job, because there are commitments to his wife, children, etc. But you can find a hobby in my soul. You may like to dance, be sure to go to the dance school. Find a lesson that will bring you pleasure to raise your mood. Over time, your skills and experience will become more, you can consider yourself a successful person in your favorite lesson. Thanks to this, you can gain self-confidence, become a more cheerful person.
Tip 10: Get out more often from the comfort zone
Many get used to their everyday life, so much that the exit from the comfort zone becomes unthinkable for them. But still we advise more often to leave the comfort zone.
Understand that you are stuck in the comfort zone, very simple. If before some new situation you are fear, you are probably afraid to exit the comfort zone. A new situation or even thoughts about it can cause curiosity, hype, anxiety, but fear suggests that you are afraid to be beyond the boundaries of the usual and comfortable situation.
If you fail to leave the comfort zone, as a person to stop developing and growing. And this greatly affects self-esteem.
Travel more often, do not be afraid of change, do not hold on to the exhausting, but familiar relationship. Allow yourself to get out of the comfort zone, and you will not be able to note your personal growth, and after him confidence in your abilities.
You need to believe in yourself and believe yourself. If you fell into the trap of uncertainty, start working on your installations and most importantly - act. If you want to truly become confident by a person, you will definitely get the desired one.
Video: How to find confidence? Exercises for confidence
After moving to a millionth city from a small village, I understood how many complexes, grip and uncertainty in me.
At the university I really wanted to participate in the Jewel and sign up to the vocal group, on the street - to get acquainted with a cute guy, and also go to the neighbors and ask them not to make noise at 2 o'clock. Yes, I wanted it all, but "could not".
And here, after 7 years, I can already tell me how to become a self-confident man.
What is self-confidence
Being a leader, stand in the forefront, admire and inspire, make bold actions and trust - all this can self-confident people.
Confidence is peculiar to actors, politicians, businessmen and all those who are considered to be equal. But there are cases when external success does not increase self-esteem.
The feeling of confidence is influenced by:
the presence or absence of achievements in school and at work;
dependence on someone else's opinion;
Relationships inside the family and with friends.
Confidence in yourself is the ability to correctly evaluate your strength, not to be afraid of life difficulties, even in a hard watch to see the positive parties and feel respect for yourself. This is not fearless, this ability to fight with your fear. A confident person is not afraid to risk, he knows that there is an output from any situation.
It is important to understand that self-confidence and self-confidence is not the same thing.
The first case is an example of a healthy self-esteem, i.e., people know their pros and cons and do not try to undertake neither one or the other. But unnecessary self-confident personalities do not pay attention to the shortcomings or they do not recognize them at all. However, in any case, you need to strive for the development of positive qualities and not to close your eyes to the problems.
When the world ceases to be hostile, and a person does not consider himself a victim, then his abilities are revealed, he shows itself in the best light and achieves his goals.
Adjust the look at yourself at any age. New thinking will allow you to go ahead, change the external and inner world for the better, to establish relationships with loved ones and not get stuck on the black lane.
Confidence is not a gift that is given to certain people from birth. It can be developed and for it you need to fight - first of all with yourself. And when there is confidence, it must be tried to keep. In an instant, self-esteem may decrease, and uncertainty will appear. Why does this happen?
Causes of unsure behavior
Psychologists advise looking for root causes of uncertainty in children's memories. Not necessarily in the family should be an authoritarian mother or dad that intimidate, punish or much require a child. Sometimes it is enough just to scold him in front of the peers.
Common causes of self-satisfaction in children:
Parents do not support and do not praise for success, but for the misses they definitely scold;
Mom and dad say: "You will not succeed", "don't even try", "it is meaningless";
ignore the needs and desires of the child;
compared with other children;
The child is experiencing bullying school.
Children's uncertainty and low self-esteem are often moving in adulthood, where the person already formed behaves indecisively and limply. New sources of loss of faith in oneself can be:
obsessive anxiety that cannot be controlled;
lack of willpower and motivation;
discrepancy in the invented ideal;
increased emotional sensitivity;
Disadvantages of appearance;
lack of work, an unloved business or low salary;
unrealized dreams and plans;
lack of talents and abilities;
looped in past failures;
lack of a partner or recent parting with him;
Fear in any variations;
Nelyubov to yourself.
We will analyze one of the reasons on a specific example.
In the third year, I found the strength in myself and filmed in the theater circle. At the rehearsal, it seemed to me that everyone was mocked by me, images of monsters and monsters were identified in the head.
When it was time to unite in the group, I was clogged into the corner and thought that none of the guys would suggest to join them. Thoughts became more darker and darker, I considered myself a lot of talents and abilities. And in less than a minute I concluded that I hate myself.
And when the dislike I was already eaten from the inside to me, two girls came up with a proposal to join them. And then I looked around ... just did not withstand the internal pressure. After that, I no longer came to rehearsals, threw the lesson, which I really liked, for which I began to hate myself even more.
If you still hard to overcome indecision, be sure to read the article "how to love yourself."
Fast ways to find faith in oneself
The acquisition of confidence and healthy self-esteem is a long process requiring perseverance and desire to change. But what if the determination, courage and hardness are needed today tomorrow?
There are methods to help believe in a short time. Let's go from the easiest (you can apply here and now) to more complex (will take 2-3 days):
Picture confidence: Shoulders back, head higher, back straight, proud walking, face expresses calm. Your body must talk for you that you know the price. Now look in the mirror - this is what a confident person looks like.
And do not forget about the smile! Even if I do not want, everyone will smile, and then you can feel the tide of energy.
Speak measured, leisurely and necessarily loud. Do not mumble, but put it clear and clear. If you feel that you do not understand the question and are afraid to say something nefple, try to change the topic of conversation.
New furnishings, new "I"
Remove your room, and better all the apartment. Make a permutation and replace bed linen. Feel how everything is transformed for the better.
There are gifts from the former? In the garbage! Little souvenir from the resort, where did you choose? Roll down and do not spare!
And after updating the place of residence, change yourself. Make a new haircut, buy clothes of unusual colors, change the perfume or put an accessory atypical for you.
Get the diary and write in it that the good happened in the day. In the evening, develop a plan for tomorrow and follow it for sure. Be sure to note that you managed to execute.
Make a list of your achievements. Attach the sheet with a prominent place and add something new every day. Let it be a trifle: "He helped a neighbor to convey the bag", "passed 8 kilometers," "rose half an hour before."
Praise yourself for each executed plan and for every new achievement.
"Thank you" and "please"
Take compliments with gratitude. Do not disdain from them, do not devalue and do not start in response to talk about your shortcomings. I sincerely smile and thank. Believe the fact that the said is true, and not flattery.
Learn not only to take compliments, but also to do them. Sometimes it is even more difficult. Try to say something good to the close person, I have sincerely sincerely. And you will be nice too.
Speak with a stranger. Offer your help or ask you to help you. Even the banal "what time" will be enough. During the dialogue, do not lower the head. Look in the eyes of the interlocutor.
To a positive through the negative
Draw your fears. What would they look like? In the form of a person, animal or incomprehensible substance? What is their color and size? Carefully look at the drawings. What do you feel?
If you are going somewhere and afraid of the upcoming event, close your eyes and imagine the worst version of the development of events. What is terrible can happen?
After such fantasies, fear will gradually begin to leave, everything will seem not so hopeless. There will be courage and determination. Read more on this topic in the article "How to Be Brand."
No longer hide a list of cases in the chunnel. Throw off your shoulders of unfulfilled plans.
Have you ever wanted to go to the aunt in Saratov? Buy a ticket and go! Dreamed of getting a spa? So do not sit on the spot. All in your hands.
Long-term step-by-step instruction on the path to confidence
Previous ways quickly help, but also quickly their action and passes. Take the fact that there is no magic medicine from uncertainty. To become truly confident, you need to work for a long time. This will help you a special instruction, and it is equally suitable for both men and women.
Step 1. Get rid of negative
Stop spend energy on toxic people. If there are personalities next to you, which are unreasonably criticized everything around, always negatively configured, complain, but do not solve their problems, they are angry with others because of their failures - feel free to say goodbye to them.
Such personalities do not give you space for growth. After each conversation with them, there is a precipitate on the soul. Release the guilt for a desire to say goodbye to a toxic person and think about yourself.
It also applies to all the rest: places, habits, things and thoughts. If something prevents you from moving forward, takes positive, pulls in the past - forget about it.
Go to the cafe where you threw a favorite person? Find another place. Do you like to sleep longer? Rise from bed immediately after alarm. Many things that are not needed, but sorry to throw out? Teach yourself every week to get rid of any three items.
Step 2. Replenish the gaps
When you get rid of all too much, gaps are formed in your mind. Fill them with useful habits.
Start with small: come back from work by another way, drink on an empty stomach of warm water with lemon or walk half an hour before bedtime.
Useful habits help to remain healthy and full of energy for many years, so think good what you should work out. Start with one one, after a month, master the other, third.
The next time you find yourself on some public event, do not hide, try to approach the stranger and speak. Ask a question, praise the situation, treat or outfit the interlocutor. In the afternoon, increase the amount of phrases and the duration of the conversation.
Try to get acquainted with educated, talented personalities who can be adopted knowledge and experience. Or, on the contrary, look for those whom you can teach something. The environment should contribute to your personal growth. Do not forget that you have much more common with people than you thought, and you should not be afraid of them. Forget about sociophobia!
Configure yourself to positive thinking. Instead of thinking about failure, scroll in your head, what to do to be conceived.
If there is a job interview, do not think "I will not work out." Tell me: "I'll do it like this, and then they will take me, I will succeed."
Step 3. Self-discipline
Self-development and work on themselves take not one week. The first two steps can become a difficult obstacle, and to overcome it, a long period is necessary. At some point, the crisis may come when I don't want to do anything. This is normal, because it is always hard to change. But it is necessary to deal with this.
Forget such phrases as "I will do then", "suffer to tomorrow", "while early". Only here and now. Overcome everyday temptation. Do not forget to reward yourself for perseverance, it gives impetus for the next step.
Psychologists are advised as prevention against laziness to use the rule "20 minutes a day." Its essence is that it is enough to allocate for 20 minutes a day on any activity so that over time to see a serious result.
Oddly enough, but to get rid of laziness, sometimes it is useful to do nothing. Full holiday - security deposit in work.
Fighting with laziness and develop the setting of the goal. To begin with, it is clearly specifically. No abstract expressions and metaphors! At the same time, you must put the real deadlines for its implementation.
Make a plan to achieve the goal. For example, your goal is 3 months later to do 100 squats daily. Space the items as you reach this result. Task number 1. Do 10 quits for 3 days. Task number 2. Do 15 squats for a week in a row. And so for 3 months.
Be sure to write down your goal on paper or on electronic media, and even better hang on the prominent place a reminder note.
Do not place many goals right away. Better do something one thing, and after go to the next plan.
Awareness that you can achieve the desired will not only discipline, but also raise self-esteem.
Step 4. Surroundings
The next step is to establish relationships. It is important that only a positive environment: relatives, friends, people who have a positive effect on you, support and help in endeavors.
Chat more, try to ask questions and give full answers, and not discontinued with single-stroke phrases. The more often you will overcome the constraint and timidity, the easier it will begin to build a dialogue.
To know which way to move, ask critics. Listen carefully, do not be offended and do not lower your hands. Do not dwell on the fact that everything is bad, but think how to correct the shortcomings.
Carefully follow the criticism to be objective and constructive. Listen only to it.
Defend your opinion if you think that right. Always use arguments, not empty phrases. Be prepared for defeat in the dispute, remove from this lessons.
After analyzing criticism, focus on solving the problem, and not on it itself. For example, at work, the bosses disrupts anger on you and verbally humiliates, which leads to self-care. Think how to fix this problem, and do not spare yourself.
Step 5. Health and Appearance
Beauty and health are not necessarily accompanied by high self-esteem. But a pleasant appearance and good physical condition will definitely do not interfere.
Sport is the key to success in many spheres of life. It helps strengthen health, pull up the shape, develop the power of the will, find like-minded people, improve well-being, get rid of the handra and depressive state, as a result of which confidence increases.
The choice is huge: Football, Basketball, Swimming, Running, Table Tennis, Badminton, Figure Skating and More. Perhaps you will find in the sport your vocation.
Balanced nutrition can be a good addition. Eat fresh, useful products. Drink more fluid, make vegetables and fruits with a mandatory part of the diet.
Do not save on appearance. Care for leather, hair, nails.
Pay attention to clothes. This does not mean that you need to spend fabric money for brand things. Buy high-quality products, clothing should be neat and easy to sit on you.
It is important that you may be comfortable in a new image.
Step 6. Self-improvement
If you follow the advice and go clear step by step, it means that you have already set foot on the path of self-improvement: useful habits, discipline, new acquaintances, sports is its elements. Continue in the same spirit.
Do affect the case that brings positive emotions. Especially if this occupation reveals the strengths of your personality. Be proud of your abilities.
Continue to learn, acquire the skills and gain experience. Learn foreign languages, try yourself in modeling, drawing and singing, writing and dancing, work on speech, sign up for acting courses. Yes, all that your heart!
Self-improvement makes it possible not only to develop intellectually, but also grow in our own eyes.
Step 7. New horizons
When you get to this step, you can congratulate yourself. You have achieved a lot. It remains only to consolidate the result.
Confident person is not afraid to risk, so you do not be afraid. Do what you used to see the nightmare: Dancing on the street right at all, write a poem and read it before the public, hug a stranger person.
Do not robet, act, become a little naked! Prove yourself that you are all on the shoulder.
Each achievement will strengthen your sense of confidence and your own dignity.
I told about what to do to increase confidence, and now let's talk, as you can not act.
Remember Step 1. We are trying to get rid of the negative, so the exact dark thoughts!
Very often anxiety comes in the evenings. Instead of shipping yourself with obsessive thoughts, read an interesting book or walk before bedtime.
There are not only enemies around you. Close and friends can help you, only if you allow it. Do not keep everything in yourself, let me close your shoulder. Do not be ashamed to seem weak, honesty and openness will benefit you.
Be a perfectionist and recognize only the perfect result
Errors do everything. Please accept the fact that they are inevitable! Confident people can handle it. They act and solve problems.
Use alcohol to maintain confidence
Remember, this is not a solution to the problem! Maybe, on a brief moment, you will be better, but the next day the experience will be returned. It is necessary to produce domestic powers without using doping.
Compare yourself with others
You are you. No need to compare your life with someone else's. Better focus on its development. We do not always see everything as it really is. People often show only an outer light sheath, hiding dark sides inside.
Blame others in their failures
You can give a lot of reasons why you do not work out: people, circumstances or just a case are to blame. But only you can fix what you does not suit you. Even if someone is to blame, now it does not matter. Take responsibility for your "here and now."
Someone has a reaction to trouble and failure expressed in the form of apathy and depression, and others in the form of anger. Negative energy should be discarded somewhere, and close to the blows are often rendered. Instead of screaming and swearing with relatives, you need to gain patience, and after honestly and openly talk to them. Tell me what worries you, and perhaps you will come together to solve the problem.
List of books for healthy self-esteem
To take the maximum to take care of finding self-confidence, I recommend to read the literature on this topic.
Jill Hesson, Sue Headfield. Come confidence. What does it mean to be associated. Tutorial for those who want to be confident. On the pages of the book you will find examples, tests and practical exercises.
John Kekho. The subconscious can be all. Work based on the results of a study on the subconscious of a person from the writer and the trainer of the personal growth of John Keho. You will learn how to formulate and visualize your goals, how to increase self-esteem and be happy. Contrary to everything.
Boris Mikhailovich Litvak. 7 steps to stable self-esteem. Literary training. After reading, everyone can better understand themselves and control their thoughts.
Pavel Alekseevich Fedorenko, Ilya Khachi. Self confidence. How to get rid of shyness, indecision and increase self-esteem. Practical guide for people suffering from sociophobia. The therapy is based on the principles of cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy.
James Rapson, Craig Inglish. Praise me. How to stop depending on someone else's opinion and gain self-confidence. Seven practices from the authors of the book on changing the thinking of a person, after which he begins to believe in himself and acquires harmony.
Anastasia Pogrega. Love for yourself. 50 ways to increase self-esteem. After 8 years of work with customers, a psychologist-practitioner decided to tell others how to find a sense of confidence and pride for himself.
Robert Anthony. The main secrets of absolute self-confidence. The main idea of the book: "After changing yourself and your inner world, you can influence your life."
Thomas Chamorro-Propusik. Self confidence. How to increase self-esteem, overcome fears and doubts. The author claims that the insecurity is an impetus for self-improvement and improvement of life. The book describes how to do the path from the lowest to the top and increase self-esteem.
Rob Young. Self confidence. The ability to control your life. Psychologist Rob Young describes methods that help to take any situation under control. After reading, you can get from life what they always wanted.
Andrew Matthews. Live easily. An Australian psychologist Andrew Matthews wrote about how to look at the world in a new way and become a happy man. In addition, the book is filled with funny illustrations for better material perception.
Oksana Sergeeva. How to awaken self-confidence. 50 simple rules. The author claims that in each of us there is confidence, it is necessary only to intensify it. The book helps "awaken" internal confidence and make her work on himself.
Robert Kelsey. Confidence code. As a smart person to become confident. The creator of the book describes its own experience and research in the field of psychology. He will tell what confidence and why it begins.
Brett Bluless, Daniel Shea. One habit a week for the whole family. We increase confidence, strengthen relationships, care about health. The book has witnessed recommendations to strengthen their own confidence, confidence in relations and gaining harmony inside the family.
Maria Nosov. I'm sure. I'm sure. The author is a practitioner psychologist, Vlogger YouTube. Her book is a collection of techniques aimed at overcoming difficulties in communicating with unfamiliar people, the acquisition of confidence and learning how to react to stress and emotionally unstable situations.
Brian Tracy. The power of confidence. The author is based on his experience in cooperation with five million entrepreneurs, businessmen and other successful people from the sixty countries of the world. Brian Tracy is confident that readers will be able to be inconsidered in their actions and easily go to risk.
Leyl Loundes. Goodbye shyness! Practical guide to overcome timidity and development of self-confidence. In the book, you will read about how to talk to people, how to get rid of signs of shyness and how to accept the past failures.
LES Gibin. How to gain confidence and power in dealing with people. This literary work is intended for those who want, but cannot make friends who seek to influence the behavior of others and convince them in their rightness.
Rosabet Kanter. Confidence. How the cycles of victories and defeats begin and end. The book has a light syllable, it is quickly read, the essence is clearly set out and is available to a wide range of readers. The author tells how to succeed in all spheres of life.
Florans BINE. My little notebook. We develop confidence. Tutorial for parents and their children. From the book you will learn how to help the child feel confident and comfortable.
Dale Carnegie. How to develop confidence and influence people, speaking publicly. The book enters into itself 3 works of the author. On pages you will find a lot of useful psychological councils, life stories and quotes of well-known successful people.
Useful materials on the topic of the article
In this section, I will recommend you somewhat good courses for finding confidence.
School of positive thinking
Description. The course helps to find harmony inside and beyond yourself, teach transform negative thoughts and get rid of the rooted attitudes and beliefs.
Training will benefit people with low self-esteem, problems with an emotional background, low level of vital energy and lack of activity in actions.
If you want you to notice you at work or there is a courage to get acquainted with the opposite sex, you wish to get rid of doubts and fears or find your place in the world, take the first step now.
Author: Alena Krasnova.
Cost: 18 000 rubles.
Learn more and start learning
Self-discipline - the key to success
Description. The following methods are used in the training:
Daily tasks and their execution;
achieve the goals;
After passing the training, you can develop a self-discipline and determination, you will come to the awareness of the true "I", learn about the mechanisms to confront yourself, increase its productivity.
The program consists of 10 modules, each of which lasts 1 hour.
Author: Stanislav Grushevsky.
Cost: 5 850 rubles.
Learn more and start learning
Confidence will not appear per day. Get rid of doubts and start changing life with your own hands. With every new step, with every little and big victory, confidence will increase, it will increase the stimulus to overcome the problems.
I am my own complexes and uncertainty of overgrowing, and you? Do you have a story, how did you achieve a healthy self-esteem? Or maybe you know more efficient ways to strengthen self-confidence? Write in the comments, discuss.
Becoming confident really at any age if you clearly accepted this decision. Confidence gives many advantages - calm, trust, security, i.e. These are the basic needs, without which life turns into a nightmare. We feel confident when you are satisfied with your emotional state, we have the necessary qualities to achieve our own goals.
For example, if at school you wrote control on "excellent", the exams and tests at the university should not scare you. But, unfortunately, everything is not so simple. In addition to practical experience in the formation of self-confidence, parental installations, environment, warehouse of thinking and character and TP are connected.
Most often, confidence is based on the positive experience, which remembers our consciousness.
How to achieve confidence
It is impossible to develop courage and self-confidence in a couple of days, but if you follow several rules throughout your life, you will be able to give yourself confidence and is in harmony with you, making the councils listed in the article by your principles. They shared successful people who have already answered the question - how to become confident.
Learn to take doubt.
A confident person understands that doubts about himself is natural . Absolutely fine, if you are unsure in excellent exam. G. Hesse said: "Doubt and faith are inseparable, they determine each other as a breath and exhalation." Therefore, it is important to understand - the uncertainty in itself is very often present, you should simply increase the effort, pushing doubts about the distant corner. Doubts are emotions. Please note that there are times when you are not sure about the favorable outcome of your case, then the opposite is full of optimism. The main thing that is required is not to cease to strive to achieve any price of the result. Doubts do not have the right to control your life.
Confidence is the ability to step on your fear and doubt.
Notice the time of the greatest doubt in yourself.
For example, uncertainty and fear is more often overcome in the evenings, or before bedtime. Treat this as the specifics of your personality and do not pay special attention, although it is impossible to ignore too. Remember that always comes morning and you can feel confidence. Therefore, always take important solutions in a comfortable period for you. Understanding of periods of his concern helps to develop confidence.
Remember the strengths of your personality.
There are periods in which you do not feel strong or simply upset. During this time, you can believe in your own fear and uncertainty, thoughts globally and carrying such a fortune for their entire lives. Do the following exercises: remember the facts when you have succeeded, could get rid of the feeling of fear, were the best, managed to achieve a high result. Related in the consciousness of emotions and real achievements.
Ignore all who do not believe in you.
When doubts are overcome, it is necessary to consult with close people . However, instead of expected support, you can get a negative assessment of your plans and recommendations to retreat. Such advice gives people who did not cope with themselves, could not love themselves and now are not particularly interested in your success. Perhaps you are jealous, and maybe really sincerely sure that you will not succeed. In any case, you need only advice of people who were able to achieve success in the sphere of interest to you, get rid of insecurity and are ready to support.
Represent the image of "perfect ourselves."
There are situations when you do not do anything, because you are sure that it is not smart enough or beautiful. In truth, you just justify yourself, uncertainty in yourself and your fear. In this case, create your ideal image in the imagination and contact him in situations of confusion and uncertainty. How would behave "perfect image"? And you will understand that the deterrent factors are insignificant.
Do not forget that much depends on you.
Restrictions we put yourself. When you assure yourself that you will not cope - so it will be . Always remember that you are a free person who has the right to learn to choose - it will act and enjoy the success or sit back.
Do not be paranoid.
Do not think that you are always watching and evaluated. People are more worried about how impressive they may look in your eyes, they want to increase their self-esteem, find the solution of their problems and add attractiveness. Therefore, do not be afraid of communicating and publicity, much less attention is paid to you than you assume.
Listen to others.
Fruits learn to be distracted from your person and interested in others, you can get freedom from thoughts about how it is worth looking and what will think about you. There are exercises, training as much as much as possible to the world of another person. They help to understand that people are very similar and there is a lot of common between you.
Perfectionism - only interferes.
Please accept the fact that no one is perfect. Everything is mistaken, many suffer from complexes. Take conclusions from your mistakes and calmly move on. In the future you can learn to be careful.
Do not be afraid of people.
To overcome the constraint in oneself helping the understanding that all people have a lot of weaknesses and shortcomings, and most of them are asked as to gain confidence. People are extremely rarely able to harm you, do not lose before the boss, a man or a woman.
Strive to be, not seem.
Attempts to prove that you are the smartest, beautiful, correct and desire to achieve appreciation speak others about what you have complexes . Stop proving your attractiveness and understand - you are valuable by yourself - what you are.
Do not be unnecessary modest.
Modesty is virtue. But everywhere should be a measure. No need to prove that you are better than it really is, but it should not look worse. Strive to learn how to talk about your advantages straight. When others pay attention to your strong qualities - just thank you, taking as deserved.
Sometimes it is worth portraying confidence.
Regardless of the fact that in life you should be natural, there are moments when it will be useful to portray your confidence . It is necessary to strengthen a positive impression in cases where you need to instill in other confidence in you. In such situations, be aware of where you are real and where they pretend.
Smile, show the interest of life and the problems of others. When you are loyal to you, it is much easier to become more confident.
Sincerity is your weapon.
Confident behavior implies openness . People who doubt everyone holds in themselves, as they suggest a negative assessment. This fear needs to be removed. Your sincerity and ability to talk about your problems, shortcomings, experiences and your opinion leads in most cases to the same effect - people also open to you and can increase confidence.
Remember that the role of appearance is minimal.
Everyone wants to look beautiful to face, gait and costume like with the cover - but know your smile, Mimic, look, mean much more and able to increase your attractiveness at times.
Do not robet.
Streking closes you many roads. Overcome your fear - see people straight into the eyes, control your gestures, watch the speech. Over time, you will have to overcome yourself.
When you appreciate you - you believe in you . The attitude of others will become a mirror of your attitude towards yourself and will be able to add you confidence.
Do not drag everything on yourself.
Responsibility is an important feature, but you should not always take it on yourself. There are no situations that do not depend on you, there are people who consider you wrong. There is nothing terrible in this. Similarly, there will also be those who will support you and try to add you a positive look at life and yourself.
Ask yourself a question: what of this?
You did not pass the interview, some plan failed, the girl was refused, or she scribbled the boss. What of this? Life does not end, and tomorrow these events will not have such a meaning. You do not concern what people think. This is their right.
Have your opinion.
Have a clear life position, determine your principles and stick to them. Of course, it is not necessary to get involved in everything in a row disputes, but your clear position will cause respect.
Regular training does not imply constantly go to any courses and spend money on it. The life of everything will be for free. A confident person communicates a lot, finds a group of interests, does not miss forums and collective meetings. We go to the interview - it is there that you need to imagine yourself in the best light, analyze your experience, tell about the successes. The result of this exercise may be the fact that you will eventually find better work or an interesting hobby, you can learn to present yourself, but the main goal of you are getting a new experience.
It is difficult to be confident in the qualities that are poorly developed. Of course, your emotional attitude is important, but if objectively you understand that you do not reach any level, you should not engage in self-deception. It is much easier to develop these qualities. Read more, you are in the society of smart people, raise a professional level.
People who strive for development are more confident.
They believe in a positive result, you can always talk to different topics and rejoice in new information, do not be afraid of criticism.
Take your drawbacks.
Above we wrote that you need to believe in our strengths. But also do not forget about the weak. The ability to accept flaws leads to the ability to control further work on oneself. Also, if you know your disadvantages, it is easier to set them out, or cover the advantages in situations when necessary. If you know that you do not know how to communicate - act from the opposite . Communicate the most, do not miss a single new person, or the situation where you can train this skill. It is terrible to perform in front of a large number of people - do it as often as possible. Show perseverance and hard work and you will definitely say that you are a confident person.
Overcoming kindergarten injuries and offended
We all come from childhood. Purchase confidence easier than those whose parents tried to raise this quality in the child. But it happens the reverse situation - you tried to inspire that you are not capable, not beautiful, you cannot love you. In this case, the task how to gain confidence in yourself - gets up in front of you. The psychology of confident behavior says that if you are no longer a teenager, it will be not so easy to raise your self-esteem. Get rid of the oppression of discontent with themselves, if you take into account such tips:
Studying past experience and the adoption of our own feelings is the necessary stage in working out how to develop confidence.
Fear, complexes are children's resentments, from which you can get rid of and love yourself.
The answer to the question of how to feel confident, laid in childhood. Find the forces to look into the past and get rid of offenses on parents, teachers, everyone who could offend you. Exercises on the study of past experience and complexes are best carried out with a psychologist, but if there is no such possibility, you will cope and yourself. It is important to increase the permissions of past . You can get rid of anger if you raise the habit of expressing it by splashing emotions through exercise. Being, for example, a strong guy - you can carry severity or wrestling. Confident behavior is the ability to be calm, and the calm brings work, exercise, the ability to control emotions.
Robility, uncertainty - this is not congenital qualities.
Some psychologists write that complexes about uncertainty - habit. The formation of them passes throughout life - most often in childhood, when inspireing the myth of our insolvency is the easiest way. While we are small, to raise us with confident's task of parents. But not all moms and dads are given to understand this - it means, becoming adults, we ourselves are able to train their identity.
And the final advice how to be confident: do not wait for you to fully confident in yourself - start today. The condition will not come by itself - he needs the experience to which it will later be described. It is likely that doubts about themselves will pursue you for a long time, however, if you recall the advice at the beginning of this article, you should not be afraid of them, define the place and time in your life. Your fear and constraint do not need to eradicate, you need to make friends with them.